You Are What You Say “YES” To

The One Mental Filter Of Billionaires And The World’s Most Successful

“The difference between successful people and very successful people is that very successful people say no to almost everything.” — Warren Buffett

According to Aristotle, “We are what we repeatedly do.” More directly, we are what we say “yes” to.

And every second of every day, you’re saying “yes” to something. Every time you do something, you say “yes” to that thing.

• Every time you hop on Facebook and begin scrolling you’re saying “yes.”
• Every piece of food you put in your body you’re saying “yes” to.
• Right now, as you read this article, you’re saying “yes.”

Self-Signaling: The Science Of Identity

According to research by Dr. Ronit Bodner and Dr. Drazen Prelec, “Actions provide a signal to ourselves, that is, actions are self-signaling.” In other words, your actions provide a signal to you of the type of person you are.

If you wake up early and go running, you think to yourself, “I’M THE KIND OF PERSON that wakes up early and goes running.”

Whatever decisions you’ve made, it’s easy to conclude that “I’M THE TYPE OF PERSON that does X, Y, OR Z…” (Luckily, as will be shown in a moment, your past is actually highly fluid, and can be changed by future actions. More on this in a second.)

In the recent book, Skin in the Game, Dr. Nassim Nicholas Taleb explains that WHAT YOU DO is the purest definition of your value system. In Start with Why, Simon Sinek said the same thing. Your actions demonstrate what you really believe.

Gandhi said, “Action expresses priorities.” He also said, “To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.” This is what psychologists call “Cognitive dissonance” — it’s a state of internal conflict. You can’t be confident if you don’t trust yourself. Confidence is a byproduct of congruent and successful behavior.

Past, Present, and Future Identities

“It’s a conscious decision to choose your priorities every day.” — Elisabeth Hasselbeck

• Your present identity is based on what you said “yes” to yesterday. Who are you today is a product of your previous decisions.
• Your future identity is what you say “yes” to today. Who you’ll be tomorrow is a product of your current decisions.
• Your past identity is what you’ll say “yes” to tomorrow. Who you were in the past is a product of future decisions. Because memories are highly fluid and change based on current and future experiences.

Your past can be redeemed by positive future decisions. Your present can make sense when you say “yes” to only that which you aspire to be like. And your future is as bright as your faith. As Napoleon Hill said, “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.”

But only if you act in accordance with that future vision…

Hence, Zig Ziglar was famous for saying, “You’ve got to be before you can do and do before you can have.” You decide WHO you want to be, and act accordingly. If you don’t act accordingly, you’ll signal to yourself that you’re someone else. Because you are what you DO. More directly, you are what you say “YES” to.

You DECIDE who you want to be. But that decision is only a real decision if you DO what that decision entails. Otherwise, it wasn’t really a decision. The decision is only a decision if ACTION aligns with it.

Conclusion

“If you have more than three priorities, you don’t have any.” — Jim Collins, Good to Great

In the book, ESSENTIALISM: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, Greg McKeown states, “You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything.”

Most thing should swiftly be said, “NO” to.

To repeat the quote from billionaire Warren Buffett: “The difference between successful people and very successful people is that very successful people say no to almost everything.”

Similarly, Jim Rohn said, “A lot of people don’t do well simply because they major in minor things.”

Most people say “YES” to minor things. Hence, most people live minor, not major lives.

Who will you be tomorrow? That depends on what you DO today.

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You Are What You Say “YES” To was originally published in Thrive Global on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

from Stories by Benjamin P. Hardy on Medium https://ift.tt/2pTPhdE